heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
