ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
