from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
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Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
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Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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