I'm eating all of the evidence.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
