Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
