what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
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