ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
