sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
