that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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