so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize