i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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