i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
