i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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