I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize