it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
