why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
