the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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