I think i sorta joined a cult last night
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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