is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
