pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Someone stole a lamp last night.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
