You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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