She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We left the knife in your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize