so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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