if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
we're making bets on your personal life
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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