i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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