Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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