I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
