dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
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needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
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