And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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