I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Everyone says I win the strip club
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
