I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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