I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
