I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
