I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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