So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
