my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
