Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
