I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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