i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize