Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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