Need sex. Gaining weight.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
