i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
worst night to have a conscience
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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