I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
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