I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
