so explain again why im purple
no
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
