Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize