sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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