How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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