I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
