This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
