I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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